Lately been ranting about our system running on greed and pointing fingers at people who further narratives that blame helpless people. I was telling a story to someone about how when I had a bunch of money I just wanted more… like greed is automatic.
So it struck me that I don’t do things for other people. I seem to just be busy floating my own boat.
So today when I parked at the beach and was putting back together the day bag I saw a guy sitting at the bus stop with dirty torn clothes and seemed to be having a conversation with no one. He stood and was talking and moving his arms like he was talking to someone but nobody was there. I didn’t want to judge him but I gauged the high probability of homelessness with mental illness. I told myself I was going to give him all the money that was in my wallet. I pulled out the money, folded it and stuck it in my pocket ready to just hand it to him. And I thought well what if he doesn’t need it. So I’ll go over and see if he wants it.
I sat with him on the bench for a couple minutes and we didn’t say much of anything. I did ask him if he was ok and he indicated yes. So it looked like I missed my opportunity.
Then, onto the beach path there’s a guy who’s chain had fallen off his bicycle. I asked him if I could look at it. And it went back on the sprocket super easy and seemed to be functional. The guy sounded like I was a godsend. But it was the other way around.